Working in the fashion world, I’ve always heard woman say to me when I’m your size I’m going to change my wardrobe. Or the ever famous; if I were your size then I could pull that off. I’ve encountered years of hearing your so tiny and cute and can wear anything. Well the truth is, I cant wear anything. And the truth is, I also longed to be a different size. Although often said in a jokingly manner; and meant to be taken as a compliment; to be honest it always made me a bit uncomfortable. Why? For several reasons. Was my size causing someone else to feel insecure? Does this woman trying to render me a compliment feel less than adequate when around me? Does this woman think that her size limits her to a certain style of clothing that she can never escape until she is a size that society deems respectable and “fashionable”? And I know it’s been said and awkwardly embraced in ad campaigns , but I want to speak my peace. I am putting this stigma to rest and want to let you know that fashion and beauty knows no size or body type. Fashion is meant to highlight and enhance our unique personalities; which includes your body. A way to express who we are; but how can we do that if we don’t accept our bodies, flaws and all.
Try Not to Dwell in the Past
I know this can be a tough pill to swallow, but one really can’t move forward until you let go of the past. Even though some consider me small (not implying at all that this is right) I used to be a lot smaller. I used to complain of clothes not fitting me right as a size double zero. Why was my waist so tiny, but my derriere so unproportioned to the rest of my body. Fast forward; now I am complaining of clothes not fitting me as size 6 and remembering when I was smaller. Gravity, two kids and my addiction to the Cheesecake factory’s vanilla bean cheesecake have changed that over the years. I used to hold on to a lot of my clothes, thinking I would get back into them. I mainly couldn’t let go because I didn’t want to part with some of the unique pieces I collected over the years. But lets be real, I was making no effort to try and lose any weight to fit back into them. The point is, embrace your “now” body. People of ALL sizes have insecurities, but it does none of us any good to dwell on the body we once had. Whatever changes, for health or other reasons, you are still beautiful and fierce. Don’t be afraid to rock fashion trends and accentuate the awesome body you now have.
Age Ain’t Nothing But a Number
There’s also a myth that once you reach a certain age, you can no longer wear certain things. I am just an so over hearing, “I’M TOO OLD FOR THAT”. Or ” YOUR YOUNG SO YOU CAN WEAR STUFF LIKE THAT”. Another news flash, I am not that young. Now I don’t know when and how this came into play, but totally not true. I think mini skirts are not just for fifteen year old girls, and shift dresses not just for older working professionals. With age, also comes a lot of shifting. Things are not as high as they used too; some parts are saggier and flabbier than normal. But trust me, we ALL have parts of our body we wish were different. My arms are a bit plumper than I’d like and I don’t have the toned abs I always envisioned. But I tell you one thing, summer is here and she has gotten these flabby bare arms and an untoned midsection exposed by crop tops thus far. As long as you feel comfortable and the style works for your body type; rock it girl.
Buying the Right Size
Working with woman and men over the years, I’ve seen a lot of people adopt the idea that when they are not comfortable wth their size, we want to cover it up. Well it should be the complete opposite. Buying and wearing clothes that are too big for you, only make you look bigger than what you are. Also, buying the wrong size because you want to fall in a certain size range is surely not the way to go. Soooooo many factors go into how an item of clothing is sized. This includes whether its foreign or us sizing; some retailers naturally run larger or smaller than their competitors, which means you can size up or down. For example, The GAP and OLD NAVY (both sister companies), brands who originated in the US, tend to run larger. On the other end ,Zara (a European brand) tends to run a lot smaller; which most European brands do. And some retailers strategically label items a certain size for psychological reasons. So please don’t get caught up on numbers. I have items of clothing ranging from x-small to large; 2-8. Whatever the number; buy what fits and flatters you the best.
We must know that your body type is unique to you and some genetic makeups that are hereditary. Some of the bodies we are longing to look like are not even real, or a large percentage of it reconfigured or purchased. Why are we longing to be something fake, when (in Coca Cola’s lingo), we we are the “Real thing”. Now this post was and is not meant to discourage any individual from certain goals or shame them for wanting to be a certain size. I simply want to encourage you to embrace who you are now, because that you is just as beautiful as the “YOU” you were before and who you are going to be. I am all for having goals in particular to weight, especially if it will result in a healthier you. I just never want anyone to feel that they cant look and be their best self if they are not the body type or size that they envision. YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL, FEIRCE AND FABULOUS!
“I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.
Remember that you are fearfully and wonderfully made. We often hear this in relation to being unique and the makeup of our personality and characteristics. But this means our physical make up as well. He made the delicate inner parts of our body as well as the outside. Whatever size you are, God makes NO mistakes; so embrace the divine creation that is “YOU” girl!
Well said. As my Birthday is approaching fast (this Sunday) I find myself thinking about my own style. As a woman in her fifties I think about what people will/would say if I wear a skirt to my knees or if I wear a halter top!! Well I guess I don’t really care because I do have skirts that fit that description and I do wear halter maxi dresses. I believe any type of garment has to have the right undergarment so as long as I’m rocking that I’m OK!! I am on the hunt for that bamboo clutch bag you rocked a few weeks ago and that will become part of my birthday outfit.? if I get it in time. If not I will have it for a later date. I love reading your blog and maybe at your next Level Up session you could address what garments work for women in our various stages of life. Make it daring for those of us who like to venture with prints and are not afraid to experiment
Thanks Maxine. and thank you for reading. These are just my opinions and knowledge I want to share from working in this industry for so long. Sometimes I wonder if I’m waisting my time writing, but comments like these assure me and motivate me to keep going. I know you will look fabulous for your birthday. Please refresh me on which clutch you are searching for via IG for your birthday. I will try to help you find it so you will look feirce and fabulous on your birhtday! Thanks again for reading! And I definitely will keep your comment in mind for the next Level Up workshop!
Angela I believe you got it from Forever 21
thanks for reading Latanya. Glad you enjoyed it
Angela , thank you so much for putting this information out there . I have always felt that I would wear what’re looks good on me my age has never been an issue . I’ve always loved clothes and dressing up. Iam a mature women wife , mother, grand mom ,great grand mom I will rock my attire til Jesus come . And some times folks my look at me funny , but Iam who Iam . PEROID ? Continue too be a blessing too others
PEGGY I loooove this. It’s always important to be who you are even though sometimes it may make others uncomfortable. and I’ll be rocking my attire til Jesus comes as well. Lol. Thanks so much for reading and I appreciate your comments!
Amazing! Your wordings continue to inspire others. ❤
Thanks so much Tonya for reading. And this means so much to me. I appreciate every person who takes the time to read my posts and comment. I hope the Lord continues to be a blessing to women like you!
Thank you. You’re on point. I used to be into fashion yrs ago. working for major department stores. I recently started buying tops from Love Culture where my daughter is an Assistant Mgr. I’m about to show her this article. My daughter has always admired you. Keep it coming!
Thank you so much Cynn. Please feel free to share. Im flattered by both you and your daughter. Keep your love of fashion; I would love to see how you style your tops from Love Culture!